But this is my final chance.
Tomorrow's Nationals.
The thing which had been stuck in my head practically all the time since yesterday after training ended.
And after that it's just no more.
No more trainings for us.
I keep thinking about tomorrow, but it's not just tomorrow, it's after tomorrow.
It would feel so different after tomorrow...
Shooting is so different from other sports.
Most of them have competition seasons, and many matches etc.
And then they get to semi-finals, finals, where they play to their bestest.
But shooting is different.
Tomorrow's the shoot.
We will just go down there, shoot, and then after that it's all over.
It's up to ourselves as to whether we will win anything.
And it's most probably we won't get to win anything but we will just try our best.
Yes, the most important thing to give it our best.
I don't want to be disappointed because I did not shoot my best.
That kind of feeling sucks.
It's not about winning or losing the competition anymore,
when you go to shoot knowing clearly that you don't stand any much chance of winning.
It's just about winning yourself, beating your own previous scores.
This is what makes shooting so different.
It's really damn fast.
Everything will be over in less than a few hours.
And so tomorrow I'll only attend two lectures,
which I would probably sleep for most of the time to conserve my energy,
and half of a GP lesson which doesn't really matter.
Then I'll be stoning until 3plus.
Lewis will be shooting first at 1plus, and I will shoot with XW at 3plus.
We will get back at 5plus.
Tomorrow is the day.
And after that it will be over.
Thinking about this makes this sad but I have no choice but to just give it all I've got.
Sometimes I wonder how did a person with lousy concentration like me get selected into this kind of sports which requires extreme concentration.
But maybe I am just supposed to train myself more into concentrating and focusing better.
And if there's any time I should be so damn freaking concentrated, it will be tomorrow.
I shall try and go to bed now.
I don't even know when's the last time I sleep so early.
But I know I will need sleep, for tomorrow.
Let's just do what I can, everything, for tomorrow.
Byeall.
