How How How???

Sometimes I just sound so motivated.So motivated to do anything, ready to put in a lot of effort just to do something I need or want to.

But in fact most of the times I'm just playing and losing at hide-and-seek with my motivation.
Somehow I just can't find any motivation.
Haiz.

One moment I'll feel like I should do a whole list of things 'cause I need to,
and the next moment I can completely not care about them and just slack.
I don't even know how I can slack so much zzZ.
Maybe this is just one of the problems when you are too pro at slacking.

I wonder how and when can I stop slacking so much.
I know when I'm determined to do things I will really do it.
But usually I'm only determined when it's absolutely necessary,
and I don't want to wait till just a month before A levels to start -.-
Seems like I have no choice but to really force myself damn hard then.
Or I'll just have to find alternative ways to make myself study...
Can someone tell me to study????? zzZZZ...........



250th post of the blog.
And it's also 3years old already!!
Hahah so fast.
That's like an average 80++ post per year.

Okay shall try to STUDY after finishing my dinner, which is soon.
So I shall end here.
And everyone should study too.
Study is good for health.
Be it physical or mental health.


EDIT: I think the word I used most in my blog is 'STUDY', but somehow it's just constant spamming of the word and not really studying -.-
Okay just being random hahahahah.






Byeall.

To do something.

Back from job week camp last night.
Didn't do anything there anyway.

So went for training this morning.
Went home in noon and had lunch.
Felt kinda tired but didn't sleep in the end.
Had been using com, slacking and watching TV since then.

Shall try to start studying tomorrow.
Like, even a little little bit.
Still gotta find out what's being tested for physics though.
The chances of passing physics now is getting less and less. Haiz.
Maybe it's time I do something about it.
Maybe like after the MCTs.

Feeling damn bored.
It's not that I got nothing to do.
I got tons of things to do.
Study, then study more, and study somemore, study until I vomit etc.
But it's just not the thing I want to be doing now
although I can't find any other stuff to do.

Okay I just felt like sketching.
Time to end my post and be off to sketching then.
May be blogging again some time soon,
since being trapped in extreme boredom is one of the main reasons for me to blog.

And I want to at least play ball a few more times before MCTs.
Tomorrow having econs lesson, exercising after lesson seems like a good idea.






Byeall.

Nothing is impossible. Think Possible.

Great.
It was so lucky indeed that training didn't get fully cancelled today.
I still got to train.

And it was good to finally level up, twice in this training, with only 2 or 3 cards in between.
From shooting the four 8 one 9 for so long and finally three 8 two 9 for quite a while,
it didn't take too long for me to get my three 9 two 8 and four 9 one 8,
since both of them were shot today.
And by next week I'll shoot my five 9 on a card and eventually going to shoot tens.

Four 10 one 9 on Wednesday was really nice,
I just missed five 10 by a little bit though.

But if you ask if it's possible to shoot 50points more in just a month,
I won't say that it's impossible.
Nothing is impossible.
It's just how close to impossible it is,
but there's always a gap for those who are willing to take the extra effort to achieve it.
Now it's just whether I can put in enough effort to make up for
all the time that has been lost in the past one year.
One year may be a longer time,
but one month may be all that is needed to make a difference.



And here I am talking about all these when the MCTs are closer,
and in fact just a week away.
Haven't started studying.
But seems like I'll just aim for an okay grade for Math and Chem,
while leaving Phy and Econs to another time to be saved.

Will be leaving for Job Week Camp tomorrow.
A good time for a getaway from the world.
The hard part is always after the camps and how we have to get back to reality.
But I shall leave that till next Monday.

Monday, Wednesday having trainings and Tues will be Econs tutorial.
I will make sure no one ever touch with the remaining days of my holiday then.
Shall end my post here now.







Byeall.

No more.

Felt damn slack for the past few days since the last weekend.
Yea like since when I don't feel slack? Hahah.
But this kind of phenomenon occurs like every once two or three weeks?
Like suddenly no more momentum at all, no more drive, no more motivation,
no more whatever.

No more.


Felt like there's no more things to do.
But clearly I know there are still more work to be done.
And even if I'm doing anything I won't feel like doing work at all.
The good thing is holdiays is few days away.
The bad thing is MCTs are right after holdiays.
The worse thing is I haven't start studying for it.
The worst thing is I don't feel anything as I'm typing this.
No fear, no motivation, no pressure,
no whatever.

It just feels like.... I'm still in J1, or even secondary school.

But no more J1, and even no more secondary school.
It's been over a year already.

To start studying for MCTs,
then JCTs, prelims and eventually A levels.
It just seems so far yet so near at the same time,
seems so hard to start asking myself to study,
even if I see people around me all studying and working hard.
Okay maybe not everyone, some are just slackers like me hahah.



业精于勤，而荒于嬉。

Maybe, no not maybe.
This year I should start earlier,
it's J2 and not sec4 already afterall.
Maybe in Term2, middle towards the end of Term2.

I can already imagine losing time to do other stuff, or rather to just not do anything,
and that may be the part which stops me most.

Sometimes the difficult thing to complete a task is no in the task itself,
but your mentality and mindset which prevents you from even starting.
It's all about the mind.
And it's not hard actually to just ask yourself to do things,
it's your mind afterall.

Apparently that's unless you have already lost your mind.


For now I shall continue to slack till a day when I realize I'll be screwed up forever if I don't start studying. (:






Byeall.

ZIG-ZAG.

Hello. TGIF.
Then again, actually not really.
Another week has gone.

It's once again closer to A levels and yesterday was also the release of A level results.

Didn't stay back to wait for the release of results though.
Went home at 1plus after eating lunch.
Then I went to sleep.
Woke up at 4.45pm and realize I need to go out soon.

So went to meet up with the rest and travelled to Outram Park.
Visited Winnie and talked to her for quite a while before heading down for dinner.
Was feeling damn hungry I remember.
Ate already, chatted, and finally travelled back to Tampines.
And I was already starting to feel hungry again -.-
Reached home, bath, ate, blah blah blah and here I am once again blogging in the middle of the night.

And rather than saying 2 more weeks to MCTs,
I would say it's 1 last week till holidays.
Yea, 'holidays'.

Hopefully I can still make use of what's left of it,
mostly the second half of the week to study for MCTs.
Especially Physics and Economics.
It's really screwed up when these two subjects are tested on the same day,
the second day of the MCTs zzzZ.

Shall try to enjoy and make full use of the last week of term 1 then.
Things will start to get crazier with the start of term 2 and after MCTs...
And that's not even considering what's gonna happen in the 2nd semester.
Thinking a bit too far? Perhaps not.
Just slightly more than half a year later there's this big event which gonna affect everyone's life.

It's getting late and I shall go to bed then.
Seems like my plan of trying to sleep earlier is not working well zzzZZ.
Something tells me that I'm going to sleep at around this time tomorrow too.
Let's hope it's for a good reason though, like studying or whatever hahah.





Byeall.

Relax. Focus. Concentrate. It's all about the mind.

NTU Shoot over.
Left with just the last one, Nationals.

I don't know izzit nervous or what but I kept drinking water.
Spammed like siao.
But I sorta predicted that it would happen already so I brought 2 bottles,
and with the free one they gave, I got 3 bottles at the bay when I shoot lol.

And I started getting scared about firing at like 20 or 30plus shots.
Keep feeling that I couldn't stabalize myself and get the perfect sight picture.
Anw in the end obviously I manage to finish the shoot, by the last 30mins I think.
We should just make good use of the time to rest since it's given to us.
Shot 502, which apparently isn't really that good compared to other schools.
Ranked 18th among 24people who shot with us today.
Lucky there's still one month to improve,
it isn't really enough for us to improve much though.
We can only do our best and that's it.

So I went back school for GP.
Like another TCS again.
And played ball after that.
Reached home at 5plus, ate a bit, slacked a bit, bathed, ate, use computer.

And I felt like it's a freakin Friday today.
Like don't even care about what's gonna happen tomorrow when there's still school.

Life goes on after whatever has happened anyway.
Especially school and lessons.

Luckily tomorrow will be a slack day, except that there's chem test.
And tomorrow's also the release of A level results,
good luck to those taking it!! (:

And also, good luck to our rifle guys and girls competing tomorrow!! ;D

Because of that, there'll be no training tomorrow.
How I wish there's still training or at least can let us train a little bit.
Well looks like we can only resume training next week,
stop during MCTs, then continue again all the way till Nationals then.

Shall try to study a bit for chem test then. -.-





Byeall.

Forms. On and Off.

NTU Shoot tomorrow.
Like, finally.
After so many weeks of trainings, finally it's the NTU Shoot.
The Nationals will be up next soon.

Kept having the feeling that I'll somehow screw it up.
Today's traing proved otherwise.
At least I'm a little bit more encouraged now.
More used to the gun.
More feeling of how to shoot better.
More motivation to aim for a higher score.

And so for tomorrow it's time we give our best and enjoy the shoot.
It will be another experience for us to do even better for the nationals in April.

Shall try to sleep earlier today, need more rest.
But pistol man is on the second detail while pistol woman is first,
so it seems like we will still have quite some time to rest tomorrow morning before we shoot.
And until then it's best to focus and keep the concentration till the shoot is over.

For someone who can easily be distracted,
concentration was never one of my strengths.


Good luck to all of us for tomorrow then.





Byeall.

Monday blues.

Apparently I'm still a little sick.
Just some cough so it's okay I guess.
Thought that I would be able to recover fully over the weekends zzZ.

So it's another day, another week, another month.
As usual, Mondays are somewhat tiring.
And it's like the earliest day.
But somehow the lessons and the timetable is arranged in a way that could make us feel more tired.
Or maybe it's just Monday blues, or some other kind of psychological mentally affecting factors.

2 more days to NTU shoot.
Seriously think I gonna screw it up.
Can't even train properly today zzZ.
And another bad thing is that Chem test's on Friday, and competition's on Thursday.
And Chem tutorial's on Thursday too.
Gonna screw up Chem Kinetics I guess.
And Maths test's on next Monday.
Got scammed by the teacher lah last week he said Friday,
then I ask LT1 they said Monday and I thought we can have some reference.

Okay shall go off now.
Gotta start studying for MCTs soon too.
But still got Job Week to settle,
ohh and trainings during holidays.
Rahhh.

But somehow, it will just work out eventually.





Byeall.