Today I don't feel like doing anything...

Hey guys.

So it's been a week into my SCS course at Pasir Laba Camp which is far far away in Joo Koon.
Well all I can say that is I really miss BMT times a lot a lot.
My section mates, the way Viper do things, our commanders and all that.
Guess that we're just too used to it and the change is too fast for me to adapt to.
Most people still find SCS a good place though.
Probably because of the slacker regimentation.
Well for me I'd rather have a more strict environment but training's not as tough.
Because from what I see, our schedule are packed like crazy and we're definitely going to suffer during training.
Learning how to operate so many things in just two days is certainly not gonna help.
We'll have our SAW live firing on Monday if I'm not wrong and half the things I learnt last week are already all gone from my brain.
And then there's Pro Term, or ASLC as some call it.
Well I just hope to get sent to other vocations, preferably support units man.
Army life's making me sick and I just don't feel like 'chionging' anymore.
Well maybe at moments I do because I don't want to get screwed and by doing so we would probably get to rest more.
But I just don't see any need for me to fight to be the best or top few or whatsoever anymore.
Even people at OCS are feeling the toughness, or rather they're feeling really homesick because there are two more weeks before they get to come out.
And it's only going to get worse from now on.
Sometimes I really wonder how would life be like without NS,
and when I think back about my life I led as a civilian, things really seem unreal and it's like I've been living a dream for the past 18years of my life.
I'm sure these 2 years gonna be the ones which felt like a dream after I ORD and get back to studying life.
But as of now, I really really just hope to be able to get this whole thing done and over with as soon as possible...

That aside, this weekend had been fine.
Long weekend due to Good Friday.
Thank goodness.
Although it's been screwed by people who I can't communicate with.
Maybe it's my fault, maybe it's theirs.
Whatever it is, I just hope that people should understand that it's only normal to acknowledge a message or reply to questions if you do not want the other party to have a wrong assumption about your thoughts.
And things shouldn't be left till last minute unless there's really no choice.
An early message does certainly help a lot in doing many things.
And yes these do piss me off so well perhaps I should just live a hermit life every bookout because I can't possibly get pissed off by myself as much as I did by others.

On a brighter note, I finally caught Source Code today with PLC07 minus Chandan who went for his Innotrek outing.
Can't blame him as the timing was changed just yesterday.
Who to blame?
Well well well.
The point is I get to watch Source Code and I'm just happy with that.
Then again I guess I'll still catch it alone even without anyone.

So went out yesterday with RenWei and Terry.
Somehow just the two of them when it was supposed to be a dinner with 6.
Just somehow.
Supposed to watch Source Code and somehow ended up not watching anything.
Still caught it today with the rest anyway.
Morning went to NAS to find out that Scout meeting's cancelled and NAS was locked anyway.
So got kinda frustrated from getting locked out and waking up early in the morning for nothing.
Basketball was already cancelled because of literally everyone having some cock up and now that.
Well went to Tmart to take a look at the newly renovated Kopitiam and for Terry to have his breakfast.
After that we just played ball at carpark court till we both had to go.
Went home, bathed, ate a little and watched Spongebob before heading out to meet the rest.
First time since forever in going to Jansen's '4r2 outing'.
Well it was kinda stupid that we travel to Bukit Timah for lunch.
Okay it's really stupid.
But oh well since I don't really have anything to do and like what SuTing said, it's not always that we get to meet each other and the chances are only going to get less and less.
Somehow ended up cabbing back with CJ in order to catch the movie.
That's about it for this weekend so far.

Always feel like I should pack my bag the night before booking in but never truly did it.
I shall try doing it later, or at least majority of the stuff I need to pack so that I can really take a rest and not think about army until booking in time tomorrow.
Still don't know how am I supposed to go there myself.
After entering NS I just feel like cabbing whenever I need to go out.
Of course I don't do that all the time but having to go Joo Koon and back every week is just extremely tempting for me to cab.
Gotta find more people to share the fare with though.

Need to buy a bag so that I can book out with it.
But for now I'll just use my school bag I guess.
And then now I need a pair of sports shoes because mine's like freakin' cui already.
When would I find time to buy stuff man.
And I really feel like I should stop spending so much because even though I only get to spend once per week, I felt like I'm spending way more than before.
And by just earning $500/month I don't think that sounds sensible.
Well shall think about what to do with this when I'm free.

Shall stop here for now and continue the next time I have a chance too.
Well at least I feel closer to civilian life now, being able to surf the net given that I have the time when I'm in camp.









Byeall.

Times ten. Or more than that.

So I got into SCS. Since by the end of BMT I'm already quite unsure if I really want OCS, compared to as when I just got enlisted, I had no preference and was just looking to get into command school before I checked my posting, be it OCS or SCS. However, if you ask me what I really wish for as my vocation, maybe I'll say MP or RP or some other slack vocations which I had not yet discovered. Hahah. Well maybe not really, but I'm already kinda sick of how the army works and sees little reason in continuing to serve.... There's so little things to look forward to too. Maybe just the jungle navigation in Lower Mandai which Andrew Sir brought us to before and finally becoming a Third Sergeant after our 6months long training course. Not sure if it's possible, it should be, so I hope to get sent back to BMTC as a instructor sergeant there rather than to be sent to unit after my training. Being sent to unit and being with your men certainly sounds fun. The bonding got to be real tight after spending time together for another year or so. But then again training the new recruits and helping to groom future soldiers sound nice too. After seeing how much our sergeants and sirs did for us, I feel that it would be really cool to become like one of them someday and train the next batch of recruits. What's more is that it's likely that I'll take the poly batch which includes many of my friends next year if I happen to get sent to BMTC lol. So I'd only finished packing just now. Don't really have much time to relax after packing already. Should've done it yesterday but was out till quite late and after dinner and such I didn't really have the time and energy to pack my stuff. Packing really sucks man. Since years ago, always packing for camps and etc, the feeling never failed to bring my mood to the lowest. The thought of spending days out of my house, consequences of not remembering to bring a certain stuff or making some mistakes, and more negative thoughts just always dampens my mood. And tomorrow's different. It's not just booking in. And if I can't even get over the feeling of booking in, this is just much worse. It's like enlistment all over again. More troublesome due to the need to bring everything in by ourselves. And further. Much much more further. The need to settle down again. The need to re-adapt. The need to make new friends. The need to learn the new system. And I definitely hope that I'll go to a welfare company this time. Screw whatever benefits going to a hiong company may have. Welfare for the win. Okay maybe not too welfare, just average. But I feel physically damn weak now. Hope that I'll be able to take the physical trainings there. Embrace change. I'm personally not a guy who likes changes. Change is inevitable. Change is a part of life. Change is everywhere. And the only thing that doesn't change is change itself. That's why understanding how something work and being able to actually work it out is two different things. Time for me to adapt to new environment again. Well one more thing is that having the ability to adapt and wanting to adapt is two different things too. And hating to adapt to changes doesn't mean you do not possess the ability to do so. Would like to type some more but there's this problem of serious time constraint. I'm already giving up my time on the Arsenal Liverpool match just to be here. And I'm not even on Tumblr yet. I just hope that tomorrow won't be tough because I need to time to settle down and more importantly, I need the time to rest because I don't think I can survive sleeping late and waking up this early again after not doing it for a week or so. Good luck to everyone reporting to their new camps tomorrow and cherish your time outside for those not yet enlisted. All the best for everyone else be it studying, going to your third year poly or working and any other things in your life. Byeall.

What am I supposed to do.

Not yet blogged about life after POP.
So I shall do it now.

After the Graduation Parade, took some photos, met up with my parents then came back to Tampines.
Ate at the round market, weird place to eat after POP but well, whatever.
Then went home and rest... okay didn't really rest, use computer for a while and then went out again at 2pm.
Supposed to meet at 2pm for a movie with Jiahao CK Engleong at 2.10pm and of course we didn't make it 'cause everyone's late and we didn't buy the tickets beforehand.
Checked out the showtimes at Century Square and turns out that it doesn't even show 'Limitless'.
Ended up rushing to Ehub to catch the 3.15pm show.
We even got delayed again on the bus from Pasir Ris Interchange to Ehub for some reason.
Somehow it just seems like everything's against us watching the movie -.-
Well but in the end we still caught it.
Not a bad show. Cool idea and all, but the story could be better I think.
I missed like 10minutes in the middle of the movie though.
Fell asleep zzz. That's how tired I was. Having only slept 2hours after marching for 7hours and 24km through Singapore from Changi to Marina Bay.

The day's not ended yet.
It's not long long day after all.
Went to BK to talk cock after the show.
And we just sat there.... right in front of the counter, without buying a single thing... till 7pm.
JH left for Ranon's house and EL went home I think.
He promised his mum to go home early or something like that if I'm not wrong hahah.
Well anyway after that, CK's supposed to meet Qihao they all basically their clique for dinner at Downtown.
Okay, they're supposed to meet him, since we were already at Downtown.
I was supposed to meet Chandan they all at 201.
So I just kept CK company until I think I need to leave.
Well, ended up I never needed to leave.
Thanks to the fact that I was lazy to go back and it seems so convenience to just get everyone to Downtown.
So Huihui came along and the rest were late and we just continue sitting there and chat.
Finally the rest came, with GY, and JJ reached already too.
Somehow we were still there waiting for something which I don't know is what.
After that CK they all went to Ehub for dinner and Chandan and RW came too.
Had dinner at BK and realized Terry was out there somewhere from Kallang to Bishan.
Discussed about the possibility of watching movie but guess we were too late in making our decision and Terry was too late in fufiling his promise of coming over.
Yea he finally cabbed over at 10pm and that was the last shows before midnight movies and Chandan didn't like the idea of not having a public transport home after a show.
But RW was despo for a movie or something and bowling is a no go after we realized there's 22groups of people queueing up.
Ended up at the arcade and played for a while before leaving for home at 11plus.
Speaking of which, I didn't pay any of them for the arcade.

So that was the end of a long day.
Then came Sunday.
Went to Fengshan CC after a last minute call by Denie to ball. Didn't play too much as it was damn crowded and the feeling of playing ball is still kinda foreign to me for some reason.
Left there at 6plus and then I messaged Suting if he wanted to dine out.
So we called up CJ and Brendon but Brendon's not free and unfortunately CJ just bought his dinner.
He still came though, after eating at home.
Called Pan to join us too when we were at 201.
And to our amazement he agreed on the spot. Really first time seeing him does that hahah.
So I ended up spending 13bucks on my dinner.
In a coffeshop.
$5.80 on some Japanese codfish rice, $4 on Chicken Rice, $1 for Milo and $2 for dessert.
Aren't I good at spending. And eating.
Chatted for quite a while before heading home.

Then came Monday.
Went out for movie again, this time with Suting they all.
Supposed to have more people coming.
But somehow there was just six of us.
Watched Hall Pass in the end since there wasn't any good movies at that time and we believed a comedy should be good.
Well sorta wasted my money and time...
Walked home after that from TMall.

Then came Tuesday.
Went to play ball with mostly people from 23/09 in the morning at Kemb CC.
Had some good matches and a final freakin' intense one under the burning hot sun.
Felt damn tired and super hungry by the time we decided to go for lunch.
Went to eat at Bedok Point Kungfu Paradise, ate there the last time with Kenneo and it wasn't too bad so we decided to go for it again.
Finished lunch and reached home at around 3plus and finally rest my tired legs.

Then came Wednesday.
The 4 of us were supposed to meet at Chandan's house to play Fifa on his PS3.
Ended up only Terry and me went.
Of course didn't have as much fun as we would had if GY and JJ came too.
Then went for lunch at around 2pm I believe, at 201.
Wasn't that hungry at that time. And weather was freakin' hot.
After that went straight to NAS to see the Scout meeting, which was DPC training so there was only the DPC people there.
Benedict's supposed to conduct First Aid theory lesson.
So we waited for meeting to start, rested a while etc.
Then just sat there, talked a little and observed them throughout the meeting.
Condor went up to take over the theory part for a while because he thinks Benedict too noob.
Shared some stories of his own, and yes I can tell that going to SO MANY camps really helped to make you a better speaker talker and whatever now.
Well but NS is coming for you too so guess helping the unit can be put on hold until we are more free.
Went home after meeting. Nothing much after that.

Then came Thursday, today.
Finally staying at home for the entire day for the first time after my POP.
Felt good, nice, got some time to really rest up.
Well sleeping for almost 12hours definitely got me rested enough.
I thought 9hours was good but I ended up sleeping extra 3hours 'cause I was alone and I didn't know how much time have past after I woke up the first time at 11am zzzz.
So didn't do anything much either.
Basically it's just using computer 'cause apparently the TV shows kinda suck now.
And there won't be much movies showing even though the weekends are coming.
Mediacorp. Tsk.
Too bad I have no cable TV and your whatever crap shit.
Then again I won't get to enjoy TV much since from few days later onwards life's gonna get effed up again.

No plans yet for tomorrow except a possible dinner with Chandan they all.
Then balling on Sat and perhaps a class gathering at Vivo.
Will get to know our posting on tomorrow, earliest 10am.
And to be honest the only thing I hope for the most now is going into SCS.
I hope I didn't do so badly to get sent to a unit and I don't exactly see myself doing good enough to go to OCS.
And I definitely still can't see myself strong enough to survive OCS either.
Maybe I'll make through it, well, I probably will, but it's only been 9weeks and it's making me sick and tired enough already.
And I don't think my BMT was that bad either.
Well maybe I just want to make life easy for myself, as usual, taking the easy way out and not trying to go for the best and such.
I just hope the remaining days of my NS life will go like a breeze and then it's back to being a student again.
And I see nothing wrong in taking psychology if that's really what I want now.
Anyway there's two more years for me to think it through and people have to start thinking before talking.

Shall end the post here for now.
Maybe will blog again tomorrow or what, some time before reporting to my new unit.
Maybe tomorrow be a good day for me, and for you guys.
Have a good night.









Byeall.

Short short break.

POP LO!!

Finally after our 24km route march followed by our Graduation Parade at Marina Bay, we are officially out of Tekong and completed our BMT.
And BMT is just the very very first phase of our NS life.
Wow.
What a long long way to go man.

Somehow blogger's screwed up and doesn't automatically go into the next line even when I typed it that way here.
And now I'll need to see < br> everywhere.
That's just do good at making me shorten my post.
And nothing else.

Hope I'll fully make use of this block leave and get rested up well.
And I hope even harder that I get sent to somewhere nice.
If by chance I can't even get to command school, then at least to some good units please.
If not then SISPEC seems like the best way to go.
Can't really see myself going to OCS now even though till the last days of BMT I was still half sure that I wanted OCS.

Well I'll just take whatever comes then.
It's not like any of us have a choice anyway.

Gonna sleep soon because tomorrow's another early day.
Goodnight guys and it's really nice to be able to sleep at home on a Monday night.
You all just won't be able to appreciate it unless you're in the army.







Byeall.

One more week.

Finally received the letter too on Thursday.
The letter of acceptance by NUS into FASS.

Finally got my IPPT Gold.
Barely made it with a timing of 9:42 for 2.4km.
But I made it. Finally.

So the past week seemed to be going quite well for me.
Things are fine and sun shine high in the clear blue sky.
And now it's already just exactly one week left to POP.

Time to leave Tekong and all my section, platoon mates and Viper Company 01/11 batch.
And then it's just the beginning to another stage of my NS life which is far from over.
Sigh. Far from over.
That's the worst part.

While the girls our age are half a year from living their student life in Uni,
we're stuck right here with more than two years to go before getting to study again.

Haven't gone out since booking out and don't think I would get to do that.
It's like 24 more hours to book in again.
Well I gonna have a week of free time to go wherever I want,
so let's just hope this week passes by quickly too.
Just gonna slack and rest and relax at home for now then....

Few more days to another year to add on to my age.
And I gonna spend the days leading up to it,
and the days following it in camp.
In camp doing Graduation Parade rehearsal, over and over and over and over again.
How much much more retarded can it get.
Sigh.
Well just gonna celebrate it in advance with me family today,
not like people usually celebrate it for me anyway.
Just that the thought of a whole week of GP rehearsal with my birthday in is really really boring.

Well we're all growing up now.
Last year of being a teenager.
All so fast.








Byeall.

It's here again.

Just a quick short one before booking in again. Supposed to blog like last night or what but forgotten about it. And now I'm left with 40mins before I should appear at Pasir Ris interchange. I can never get over this booking in feeling. Killing me ttm I swear..... Hope that this week gonna be much more bearable though, because it's already the last week of training, with stuff like Recruit's Night, Games Day etc. I think the only major effed up thing left is BCCT, WITH RIFLE -.- Well it will be over in two days' time so let's just endure, as we always do. Okay shall have dinner soon after finish folding my Smart 4. So looking forward to POP in less than 2weeks' time. 24km route march in Singapore to the floating platform. COME ON MAN. See ya guys in a week's time.





Byeall.

Now is now.

Already two weeks without posting anything.
That's just as long as the time I spent in Tekong before I came back yesterday afternoon.

Like I had been saying, the past week had been hell.
Well, at least more than half of the week was hell.
Although the one before was kinda slack because it's been raining everyday.

Really got tekan like shit for days since Sit Test.
All the Stand-by Areas, with Camo on somemore...
So glad that there's just two more weeks of training left,
and the last one will be just graduation parade rehearsal.
After that of course it's.... POP LO!

Yea and another two weeks it will be a whole new environment again.
Bad bad bad.
Well at least the first stage of NS would already be completed by then.

So finally settled my Uni application yesterday.
Took me quite a while to do so.
So in the end it's still NUS FASS and NTU Psychology.
Don't know if I'll change my mind in a year or two years' time.
But for now I'll just take it as it is and hope I get the spot first.
Better remember to pay the application fee by 1st Apr though.
By then it would only be a week more to POP.
Everything just seems to gone by so fast.
And just a while ago we were still busy studying for the A's.
Now the A's are over, JC life's no more, results are back, people are actually seriously considering about their own future and what to do in Uni and stuff like that.
It'll probably take 6years of studies to be a clinical psychologist.
That's around 26/27 years old.
Then a few years to be experienced enough.
Or maybe I won't even be a psychologist.
Well for now I'll just stick with the mindset of doing what interests me at the moment.
I definitely won't want to spend time studying things that I find boring for years after NS.

And as for now, now, I just hope the weather is fine tomorrow morning.
Finally gonna touch basketball again since like forever.
Gonna have some real fun before booking in again for just four days this week.
So this week will be gone really fast and I hope it goes the same for the next and I'm sure it will be.


And this was what I said a few days back.
Very very meaningful stuff.

'They said now, you know what is NOW?
Now, is now.
They said now.
Now is the later of just now.
Now is the just now of later.'

So to add on to it,
the now just now is not now because the now just now is already just now of just now.
The now of later is now because it's already later.
Now is the later of just now.
And now is the just now of later.

Now is now.






Byeall.

Aftereffects.

Finally release of A levels results last Friday.

Booked out a day earlier, after Field Camp.
It was definitely one of a hell.
I don't need any comparison, I'll just call it hell no matter how much tougher other people's field camps might be.
Thank god, it's over now.
Now it's just 6 weeks left and the only tough thing I need to overcome is building up stamina and strength for route march, and also for my 2.4km.

So much for army crap.
Now it's time to talk about more normal stuff like A levels results.

Not much of a happiness or disappointment really.
More or less like what happened during my O levels results.
'Cept that there was a huge disappointment for my HCL and pretty nothing much else.
And this time, there wasn't really any extreme feelings.
I don't know if it's because army life diluted my senses towards this or that I was really just relieved to see that my results turned out more or less fine and the way I expected.
I guess when everything's in control, life isn't just life anymore.
Still, as always I'll thought of how much better I could've been if only I studied harder instead.
A for Math and Chem, B for Phy and GP, C for econs.
And I really do wonder how many from our school actually got an A for h1 econs.

Now it's just what I do with these.
Continue with Psychology?
Or something new and some other courses which might be more relevant to the context of Singapore?
I've got two more years to decide after all.
That's a whole two more chances for me to set my mind straight.
Perhaps for now all I need to do is just securing a place in FASS and let my life for the next one year decide for me if I should do something else.
After having that thought my mind seemed much calmer and things seem clearer.

Still, having things unsettled and the need to book in again isn't allowing my mind to rest.
It's two more weeks again.
Sometimes we just have to learn to let go at the right moment, so that it won't hurt as much as it might have otherwise.

I hope I'll gain some insights on stuff I do not know of yet during next week's open house.
It's also the only time I'll be let out for the next two weeks.
Thanks to situational test which I hope I'll be able to perform.

Gonna be 3 soon and I shall head to bed soon.
Ohh and watched Finding Nemo today, not the whole of it though, missed the front part.
It was 8years ago and I can't believe it.
Still a nice show though. (:







Byeall.